Things that happened in October

My Arch Nemesis

Yep, I'm really that lame. It's November and I'm just now writing my next post. People, I'm busy! For instance, I have to take care of these beasts which continue to haunt my back yard.

Leo

And I had to get Ryan ready for his Masquerade Bash at school. Since Ryan is in the Science/Tech program, the class project for Halloween was for each kid to come up which a famous scientist, get it approved, and then write clues so the rest of the class could guess who they were. Ryan was Leonardo Da Vinci, wearing Daddy's bathrobe.

The Boys and Baby S

And of course I still have Baby S with me 3 days a week. Every Halloween Gilman Village has Trick or Treating for the kids. Which is great for families, but frankly, a nightmare for everyone who works there. Mara and I spent 3 hours, not selling yarn, standing in the freezing cold doorway handing out candy. Both of our Mikes brought the kids by for a visit.

Earflappy Hat

Of course, throw in about 74 loads of laundry and you can see I've got my hands full these days. I did manage to clean my master bathroom today. That, wow. It had been awhile.

I'm using my extra-awesome photography skills here to show you the baby earflap hat I'm making for a friend. They also want matching mittens, which I think will be cute. But I honestly don't know if I've ever actually made baby mittens before....can't be that hard, can it? The great thing about baby mittens--no thumbs!

Snowbird Mitten

Last, but not least, here is my crowning glory. The left hand part of the Snowbird Mittens.

SnowBird Mitten Palm

I have to say, I'm pretty stunned that I was able to do it. Once I block it, I think it will look great, and it actually fits!

I'm still working on my 3 different pairs of socks, all for 3 different people, who should know me well enough to know that I have WAY over-committed myself here, what with the chickens and baby hats and scarves and everything else I'm knitting. I've been blatantly honest about the shear number of projects I have going, so if these 3 sock people are reading my blog (and I believe they do...), then they've hopefully done the math and realized that I'm a bit behind. I just continue to work on projects as the spirit moves me and somehow they all eventually get done....although I'm thinking I need to have a no new projects policy until I'm able to check a few of these outstanding items off my list.

If I intend to write this post and publish it in one sitting (and I believe I do), then the time for me to go is now. I have to fix dinner and present it to 2 boys who have no intention of eating it. They can't start whining until they see what I'm making, so I'd better get the show on the road!

Cluck Cluck

Chicken #1

My first chicken in hatching. That's right, my first chicken. Ok, first of all, how I can knit just one of these things? B. My cousin weighed in and expressed extreme interest in a chicken of her own. And 3. I'm starting to think my mom may need one as well.

Again, this girl who developed the chart is pretty darn clever. I am enjoying knitting it (although, truth be told, it's best done without too much wine). My only real disappointment is that she created the chart for the smallest of the three sizes. I was hoping it was for one of the larger chickens. And a smarter, braver, math-ier person might be able to convert that, but I know my limits. It's going to be small chickens all around.

Very little progress...

Leah's socks have been finished and delivered.

Mom's socks, finished and delivered.

Emily's coffee sleeves, finished and delivered.

Kristin and Tiffany's socks--inching my way along on sock number 2 for each of them.

Snowbird mittens--a whole 3/4 of an inch!

With free sock needles, I'm getting the itch to start more! It's all I can do not to allow myself to begin Scott's Alpaca Sox pair, especially now that my circular needles are again free. And I have piles of Jane's Lorna's Laces calling my name....Actually the only reason I haven't started the socks for Scott (husband to Kristin) is time.

With my husband working a 2nd job at night four nights a week, and then with me working on the weekends, I spend a lot of time dealing with things around the house all by myself (except for the giant dead rat in my driveway. That I waited for Mike to deal with. There are some things I JUST WON'T DO). But between the laundry, school shopping, refereeing Lego ownership, the laundry, convincing Ryan to eat his lunch, cleaning up popsicle drips off the kitchen floor which is interesting because I have a strict popsicles-only-outside-policy, the laundry...well, you get the picture. I'm not complaining, mind you. We're very grateful for the work. There are still a lot of people out of work, or waiting for the ax to fall. And finally finally finally, we are no longer those people. But as a result, my bathrooms don't always get the attention they deserve and my garden....oh dear. Well, fortunately, most of my beloveds will continue to grow even if I don't have time to tend them.

In less than a week I will officially have a 4th grader and a 1st grader, I will be able to rid myself of the giant pile of school supplies sitting on my dining room table, and peace will be restored to my kingdom once again. Between the hours of 8:00 and 3:15. All I need is some cold rainy weather and my joy will be complete!

Making Progress...

Leah's Lilypad Socks

Hello people--I'm back. I have several things to share with you today, so prepare to be impressed!

1. Deer update: it seems the deer have taken my threats to murder them in their sleep seriously, as they appear to have moved on to greener pastures. Which means my tomato plants are laden with tomatoes and my rose bushes are short, but in full bloom. Any deer reading this, be for- warned--I shoot to kill.

2. I suck as a photographer. Jared Flood says that knitted items look best when photographed in natural lighting. So that is what I did today. I took all of the items I wanted to share with you outside and photographed them on the deck. Which apparently I did wrong because the sun was too bright and everything looks washed out. Whatever. If you squint real hard you can see Leah's finished Lilypad socks (see Leah, FINISHED).

Socks for Mom

3. I'm getting close on my mom's Mixed Berries Monkey Socks,

Socks for Tiffany

4. I'm starting on sock #2 for Tiffany...

Socks for Kristin

5. ...and I'm making good progress on Kristin's socks. Whew! That's a lot of socks! I'm a little embarrassed to tell you how much sock yarn I have left, thanks to Jane, but I will tell you that it's somewhere in the neighborhood of a baker's dozen....

Coffee Sleeve #1

6. I'm especially proud of this picture, being the worst of all the photographs I took today. Wow. This one is truly bad. But you still get the gist. My sister Emily has been hinting about coffee sleeves. Emily is a hairdresser. And more importantly, she is my hairdresser. And the irony is, she is one of those weirdos who never wears socks. Ever. Dead of winter--no socks. Here I am, oodles of sock yarn coming out my ears, and no point in gifting her with the only way I can afford to pay her (did I mention I never have to pay her?). So when she mentioned coffee sleeves, I remembered that my new Knitted Gifts book has a pattern for a great coffee sleeve. This first one I did in a charcoal gray Cascade 220 tweed (which is well hidden by the beauty of this natural lighting).

Coffee Sleeve #2

...and this second one I am doing in a brand new yarn called Brae Tweed, which is a merino, llama, and bamboo blend. I'm putting cables in this one, just to mix things up. This is a fair trade for a cut and color every 5 weeks, don't you think? No, I don't think so either, but it's a start!

One Step Closer

7. And finally, the piece d'resistance--I bought the pattern for the chicken this week. I think I shared this with you a few months ago, and it has been on my short list ever since I laid eyes on it.

Now, the original pattern, by Blue Sky Alpacas (and let's be fair, Susan B. Anderson) is fine. Cute, but not compelling to me. But when I saw that someone actually created this design and knit it up in these striking colors, well, there is no WAY I'm not going to make this thing! This has my friend, Heidi, written all over it. Between Christmas and her birthday, this will be gifted to her. And I can say all of this loud and clear on my blog because she will never ever read it.

Heidi is a dear friend. One of my best friends. And I don't believe she has ever read my blog. To be fair, I don't think she has ever read anyone's blog. Heidi cares less about technology than anyone I know (although she may be neck in neck with my mother, who can't find her own daughter's blog). So I can talk about Heidi and the gift I'm going to make her all day long on this site and she will never ever ever know of it. When I give it to her, she will be totally and completely surprised. Heidi Heidi Heidi Heidi! See--she can't hear me.

This particular chicken is made out of Cascade 220, which is so completely affordable. The pattern cost me all of $5.50, and the chart was generously made free by ElleM, who, let's face it, is a genius.

And now, I have 2 hours left of freedom before picking up my boys from their playdate. Then the fun will really begin when I take Eric to the doctor during rush hour to confirm his case of Fifth Disease (don't freak out people who have been around Eric--it's NOT contagious. I repeat, mother of Blake, NOT contagious). But since his rash currently makes him look like he's gone 6 rounds as a prize fighter, I'm thinking someone with an actual medical degree should confirm the diagnosis that I came up with via Shirley-the-neighbor and Cori-the-nurse. Rumor has it, the rash from Fifth Disease can last for weeks. Good thing they moved school pictures up to September 1st!

I'd love to stay and chat all day, but I don't want to. I'm going to bask in my last 2 hours of solitude.

Royal Update

Actual Rose Buds!

OH HEAVENS TO MURGATROYD IT IS HOT THIS WEEK. Ok, fine. I know I complain about the heat all the time and I'm always telling you about THE HOTTEST WEEK OF THE YEAR. But this time I mean it. No, really. Seattle is in for record heat. Tomorrow it is suppose to reach 101 at SeaTac. And that always means a good 5 degrees hotter where I am.

People, we're not equipped for this here in Seattle. We have no air conditioning. We have no swimming pools. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we live by the water and can go to the beach.....THERE IS NO SHADE AT THE BEACH AND IT'S GOING TO BE 105 DEGREES. I can't cope with this weather. It makes me yell. The inside of my house reached 91 yesterday. That is with all the doors and windows open and the fan blowing. Currently it is 10:00 am and it's already 81 inside my house. Last night I actually sent my boys to bed with ziplock bags filled with ice.

I could complain about this all the live long day, but I do have other news to report. Namely, the deer seem to have disappeared. Perhaps they died of heatstroke. We can only hope. Actually, I have noticed their absence for the last few weeks, but didn't say anything in case they read my blog and were waiting for me to report that I have actual roses on my rose bushes and tomatoes on my tomato plants. Truly, now that I have shared this news with all of you, I will not be the least bit surprised if I wake up tomorrow morning to find that they all came back to the Keene breakfast buffet. I really do hate those deer with the same intensity as the hatred I have for the heat. Which proves my theory that they are creatures straight out of hell.

It's Here It's Here!

I'm telling you--nothing makes me crankier than a thermostat that reads anything over 72.

I do have some happy news to report: my beloved new book arrived! It came early and it came to me free of charge--how much happier could that make me, I ask you?

Hobby Horse

I just have to show you some of the projects I plan to make the next time money drops from the sky into my lap and the space/time continuum opens up and gives me 5 extra kid free hours each day.

Can you believe this Hobby Horse? Does this not have that baby, Blake, written all over it. Ok fine, you don't actually know him, but if you had a baby boy in your life, don't tell me you wouldn't be thinking of making this for him.

Gentleman's Scarf

I know it's hard to see the texture of this scarf from your vantage point, but trust me when I say, this scarf is stunning. They knit it out of a fine gauge cashmere/silk blend. We have some Blue Sky Alpaca Silk in a sport weight at the shop that I think would be equally beautiful. I do have a couple of men in mind that I think would actually wear this.

Texter Gloves

How funny are these?

Ballet Flats

I don't see myself making these anytime soon, but I just had to show them to you to give you an idea of how beautiful this book is.

Animal Crackers

Truly, I would have taken a picture of each project in this book, but my fingers are starting to fuse to the keyboard. There is a baby blanket that is flat out beautiful. There are great socks. Even the hat and mittens on the cover--a must knit for my niece Ellie who loves light blue hats.

I mean, honestly, when will I ever knit these things? But at least validate me in that this book is a MUST HAVE. And a girl can dream, can't she?

Today I'm taking the boys to see Ice Age, purely for the 2 hours of air conditioning. It will be a nice break from listening to the bickering over the slip 'n slide and the placement of the sprinkler.

For the moment, I'm going to try to get some knitting done before the yarn self combusts in my hands.

Who Who!

Who Who!

Well, look at me blogging again! That's twice in one week! Don't get too use to it.

I finished up these two Who hats that I found here. Pretty darn cute, don't you think? One is for that baby, Blake, and one is for Mara's baby that apparently will never come out.

Quick deer update: No sign of the evil one. Don't know if the Irish Spring is actually working, or if the creatures of darkness are haunting another neighborhood this week. We shall see...

Quick summer break update: So far my boys have spent almost all of their time outside, which suits me just fine, until they come in at the end of the day so filthy that I need to hose them down on the deck. Keith next door is nearly finished with the tree house his is building and rumor has it that Ryan and Eric will be packing their bags and moving into said tree house as soon as it's done. Again--I have no problem with that.

Quick job update: SphericalDave, husband of My Pink Toes, generously loaned Mike a laptop that, wait for it wait for it, works upon booting up. Each and every time. So that is making life a bit easier for the man who is spending every waking moment searching for jobs, applying for jobs, and networking with people who have jobs, all the live long day. Mike continues to apply for everything that moves and soon will have applied for every job posting in the world. One of those has got to work--right? We do have a couple of things we are a little more excited about than the average nameless faceless job, but we continue to wait and pray.

That all for now. Over and out.

Weekly Update

Catawampus Hat

Hello All. I'm back again--this time with the pictures I promised. I have several updates for you, none of which is job related. We are STILL waiting to hear back from that interview. Apparently a key person was out of town for the week. Which is a very valid excuse for not calling my husband for a second interview and offering him the job with buckets of money. However, it was a long week waiting to hear that information. So we continue to look, and apply, and wait....

The scene of the crime

The deer. Sons of Satan. Masters of evil. Behind those soft brown eyes and fuzzy nose is the face of a killer.

So, I built this little fence out of the deer netting my friend gave me, but it seems it was not tall enough. Woke up one morning to find the tops of my roses and tomato plants gone. Fine. Need to build a taller fence. Keeping in mind of course that we're broke. Mike and I rummaged through the garage and found several pieces of spare molding that are quite tall and stuck those around the roses, draping the netting over them. It looks hideous. It looks awful. And I still don't think it's working.

Tuesday I went out in the garden for a bit to weed. I noticed one rose bush, closest to the house, actually had 3 roses on it. This bush is, honestly, not 10 feet from the big glass door which opens to the living room. It's right there. And on the other side of that door is the couch. The couch where I sat that afternoon to knit, with my back to the rose bushes. Later on that day I went outside to cut some peonies and thought I might as well cut those 3 roses while I'm at it.

Gone. The roses were gone. In broad daylight, just feet from me, while I had my back turned, they disappeared. The netting is still intact....72hours later I am still baffled. Roses there in the morning, gone in the afternoon. All I had to do was just turn my head. Now, you have to know, I have a big back yard. Any deer coming into my yard in broad daylight is walking several yards to get to those roses. And walking up onto the deck. That deer was 5 feet from me and I was completely oblivious to it. Lately I've been keeping that door wide open--I can only imagine how fun that would have been....

See that planter? Right there.
That is where the deer was.

My next trick is to remove the netting and place pieces of Irish Spring soap all around the rose garden. I've been told the strong scent is unpleasant to the deer and keeps them away. I'm not yet ready to let my husband pee in my garden, but I'm getting closer.

Who!

The knitting: I finished the Catawampus hat for my nephew Jack. I think it's a pretty awesome hat--just perfect for an 8 year old boy.And I'm nearly finished with Blake's owl hat. I just have to find little buttons for the owl eyes, to make them really stand out. This was a fun hat to make. I had a couple of skeins of Debbie Bliss Wool/Cotton in my stash (and where that came from, I'll never know!) and it was an easy knit. So fun, in fact, that I think my manager Mara will get one for her impending kid as well.

And I'm making Kristin a pair of Narragansett socks from A Fine Fleece out of the Pagewood Farms sock yarn that Jane gave me.

Narragansett Socks

Things that are broken at my house: Car window is fixed, Ryan's eyes are not. He had a thorough eye exam and they were not convinced he needed glasses. Apparently the eye doctor has seen a lot of kids lately who are complaining of blurry vision, and she thinks it might be the stress of the end of the school year. Perhaps that goes along with the fact that he has been pure evil lately. I'm suppose to bring him back in 6 weeks to see if there is any improvement.

The tv: Yes, after 8 months, Dish Network and our ABC affiliate finally came to an agreement and we now have ABC again. Actually, we have no idea how long we have had it back, since Dish didn't actually inform us of it. Mike just stumbled upon it a couple of night ago. "Hey, look at that--channel 4 is back". THAT is customer service, I tell you. No apologies, no notifications, in fact, no communication whatsoever. Clearly Dish is run by men. And what do you bet they remove the free channel they gave us for robbing us of ABC? Dish had given us The Hallmark Movie Channel as a special prize to make up for losing the ability to watch Lost, Desperate Housewives, The Academy Awards and the NBA Finals (when I emailed to ask if they planned to show The Academy Awards on The Hallmark Movie Channel, they didn't actually give me a response). I don't particularly want The Hallmark Movie Channel and don't really care if it is part of my package, but it would be just like them to try to charge us for another channel that is clearly costing them nothing, now that we've gotten access to ABC again.

I think the president of Dish Network is a deer.

Thursday News

Ellie's Koolhaas Hat

Hello people--yep, it's Thursday again. My unofficial blogging day. Let's see, what's new in my world. A whole lot of nothing.

I did finish my niece Ellie's Koolhaas hat, which I think is pretty awesome, if I do say so myself. And I know she will love it, so I'm very excited to give it to her. Even my husband, a person lacking in all details, commented on how much he liked it.

What's new on the job front, you ask? Well, Mike had his job interview a week ago. It was a screening interview, which he thought went well. And what have we heard since then? Zippo. Nada. Nothing. Zilch. Goose Egg. So the hunt continues. We are still hoping to hear from this particular company, but until an actual offer presents itself, the search must go on. And on. And on....Don't I sound optimistic and hopeful? I'm just a bright ray of sunshine these days. In fact, if you ask "how are you?" in just the right way, I may burst into tears right in front of you. Just ask Tiffany's mother-in-law. Oh yes, I'm just spreading happiness and joy where ever I go these days.

Glenwood Socks for Caroline

I did finish my sister's socks, so that can be considered a worthy accomplishment.

I also have a couple more hats I am making, one for Ellie's brother, and one for that baby Blake, but naturally I forgot to take pictures of them before beginning this post, so you lose. We'll try for next time, ok?

And now it's time for a really fun segment called ALL THE THINGS THAT ARE BROKEN AT MY HOUSE:

1. The garage door. Yep, still broken. Apparently those things don't fix themselves.

2. The front window. See #1.

3. My tomato plants and roses. The deer fencing I put up apparently was not tall enough, as I discovered the other morning. Bastards.

4. My Blue Potato Vine, the crowning glory of my front yard. A helpless victim of this last winter's prolonged subfreezing temperatures, now an ugly brown stump. In my front yard.

5. My husband's laptop, i.e. job-hunting-machine. His monitor stops working periodically. For significant periods of time. Very helpful when you're at Starbucks for the day researching jobs and in the middle of an on-line application. That's not frustrating at all.

6. Alice, the passive aggressing neurotic peeing cat. She seems to be irked at us again. For any number of reasons. And is taking it out on our comforter. Again.

7. The sucking/dirt picking up power of my Target vacuum.

8. Ryan's eyes. Apparently he can't see anymore, so he gets to go to the eye doctor tomorrow to determine if he needs glasses. That doesn't sound expensive at all.

9. And the newest addition to ALL THE THINGS THAT ARE BROKEN AT MY HOUSE: my car window. Yep, that's right. The driver's side window to my van. Which I stupidly opened yesterday while waiting in the car at school so Eric and I wouldn't suffocate in 80 degree weather. As I started the car I tried to shut the window and heard a loud CLUNK. Which is the sound of my window being stuck inside of the door. ARE YOU &#@!*@& kidding me?!? That was an actual fist-shaking-to-the-heavens moment for me. Really. The car window. Two days before it is suppose to rain. The ONLY thing that kept me from completely losing it with a car full of kids is the fact that my brother-in-law owns a garage. Guess he'll get a pair of socks too. That Jane has no idea how her sock yarn is blessing the people in my life.

The broken window comes on the heels of our dead 4 year old refrigerator (according to Sears, this was our fault for failing to vacuum under our fridge on a regular basis and so the dust that collected overheated the motor. Seriously, that is what the Sears repairman said. First of all, that is never going to happen. Second of all, see #7). So you can see why I'm feeling especially cursed these days.

You may now refer to me as Mrs. Job.

Q & A with the Queen

Ryan's party

Yep, it's time once again for Q & A with the Queen!

1. How was Ryan's party? I will say, out of all those kids you see there, Eric (the only kid who refused to turn around and be in the picture, the little booger) was the loudest. Eric is the consummate little brother: "guys guys hey guys listen to this guys!" Ryan has a nice group of friends, and he adores his cousins, Ellie and Jack, so it was a good group.

At the movies

2. How was the movie? We saw Night at the Museum II. Which contained 2 monkeys, rather than just the 1 from the original Night at the Museum. And if you are are 9 year old boy, 2 monkeys are always better than 1.

After seeing this fine film, which I'm sure will go down in the annals of movie history, we came back to the house where everyone played soccer with Ryan's new soccer ball. And alienated all of our neighbors.

Spring has sprung!

3. What's new on the job front? Oh, my favorite topic. Thank you for asking. Mike actually has another interview a week from today. So we are very excited about that. And we continue to apply for jobs, along with 59080923 of our closest friends in the greater Seattle area. Our city currently has a 9% unemployment rate. How encouraging is that!

4. What is that gray post in the middle of your garden? Oh that. Yeah, that is what is left of my bird bath. I'm sure a deer took it out. They are out to get me. I bet one of them dared the other to sneak up to the house and tip it over. Actually this part of the garden is not as appealing to the deer. I didn't take a picture of my roses or tomato plants because it would make you too too sad.

Today a friend gave me some deer netting. I've been toying with the idea, but let's face it--not attractive. But since I didn't have to pay for it, I've decided to give it a go. So my rose garden, which is directly outside of my large living room window, is now surrounded by a wall of deer netting. So pretty. Pretty pretty. It does cause much less emotional damage to my children than waking up to a dismembered deer carcass and seeing their mother trying to get bloodstains out of her pajamas, so we'll try this solution first.

Caroline's socks

5. Knitting anything lately? I'm in the home stretch of Caroline's socks and Leah's socks are becoming pretty darn adorable. I tried to do a couple of fun things with Leah's Lilypad socks, but nothing looked right. In the end I decided that the striping was just perfect as it was. I did leave the picot cuff because it is just too precious. So, sorry Leah. I still want to make you those Biological Clock socks, but we'll have to pick a solid color yarn for that.

Leah's socks

Ellie's Koolhaas hat

6. Whatever happened to those Sonata Mittens? Oh, those. Well, I was right. Knitting them on 2's was not going to work. My stitches looked too uneven. Cascade Heritage is really meant to be knit on 1's, so I started over and that is what I'm doing. I know Kristin and/or Meghan is wanting a pair, but I think we'll have to do them in mail-ordered Lorna's Laces to get the gauge right for your man-hands.

7. Have you abandoned Mike's Town and Country sweater altogether? I know it looks that way, and for a while that was the case, but I did pick it up the other day and knit several rows. In all my spare time.

8. Please tell me you haven't started any other new projects. Well, I did begin a Koolhaas hat for my niece, Ellie. Ellie is 11 and loves light blue. And hats. I had this Cascade Superwash just doing nothing in my stash, so I selected several patterns for Ellie to choose from and this is the hat she wants.

9. And speaking of new projects, have you seen Susan B. Anderson's Knit Chickens? Oh my word. You have no idea. Actually the regular old chickens from the pattern are cute, but not terribly compelling to me. HOWEVER. I then saw what someone did with them and now I MUST knit this chicken once I rejoin society. I know. I've said that about a rather long list of projects. This blog is full of projects that I plan to knit someday. Someday....people, when I am rich and famous, I will knit all of these things I keep telling you I plan to knit.

10. Say, isn't it about time for Bob's Mom's Funeral Salad again? Yes indeed, it is that time of the year when I start making vats of Bob's Mom's Funeral Salad. About 35 years ago my dad's best friend's mom died. The friend being Bob. Story goes, at the funeral, there was this fantastic pasta salad that my mom couldn't get enough of--shrimp, pickles, olives, celery, sliced boiled eggs...not knowing who brought this salad, my mom replicated it the best she could and made it every summer when I was growing up. And we have always called it Bob's Mom's Funeral Salad. When we were dating Mike had some that my mom made and it was love at first sight. The salad, not my mom. He affectionately just calls it Funeral Salad and his eyes light up like a kid on Christmas morning when I have THE BIG TUPPERWARE sitting in the fridge, ready for him to dive in.

Well, must run along now. My children have been especially, shall we say, challenging (i.e. evil) this week and I'm starting to get the vibe (i.e. yelling) from their father that things are starting to disintegrate again. Ta ta for now!

Q & A with the Queen

Mike and the boys have left for a trip to Target, where the boys are planning to spend the money they earned picking up pinecones in Walter's yard, and feeding the other neighbor's dog, Ginger, over the weekend. Which means I have time to answer your burning questions!

Any news on the job front?
That would be a No. To date, Mike has applied for approximately 5498751987845784 jobs. Roughly. He's making good contacts, blah blah blah and I'm sure God has a darn good reason why interviews are not filling up Mike's dance card, despite my repeated requests. I would be delighted to know what that reason is. In the meantime, we're pressing onward in the job hunt. What did we all do before the internet? That is what I would like to know.

Does Eric really use The Snuggie?
Each and every day.

Seriously?
Seriously.

So Mike is done working his temporary job?
Yes indeedy. And, lucky me, this has started during Spring Break. I have ALL 3 BOYS here with me this week. It's like a family vacation gone bad. No one in this house is doing what they are suppose to be doing. Mike is not rushing off late to work, I'm not trying to convince Eric to get dressed for school, I don't have my designated Baby Hat Knitting Time while the 3 mess-makers are where they are suppose to be....today I spent hours in the yard while the boys ran themselves ragged all over the neighborhood (after picking up Walter's pinecones. In which he is sorry he agreed to 2 cents a pinecone since he apparently shelled out much more than originally budgeted. But since most of it went to his own daughter, I find it kind of funny). In fact, I was surprised to see the phone guy show up to fix our phone line that was apparently gnawed by small animals outside the kitchen window (perhaps the same animal that broke my birdbath. I'm developing a deep hatred of small animals. And big animals. But I digress) because it felt so much like a Saturday. But no, it's Monday and no one is where they are suppose to be. NO ONE IS WHERE THEY ARE SUPPOSE TO BE. I know that is grammatically incorrect, but it is SO TRUE.

You worked in the yard today? Does that mean is has finally stopped snowing?
Yes, 4 days ago it snowed, and today it's in the 70's. Both boys got sunburns and begged to play in the sprinkler. And by the end of the week it is supposed to be cold and rainy again. Seattle has apparently moved to the midwest.

As The Knitting Queen, are you actually knitting anything these days?
Let's see...Mike's Town & Country sweater is currently in a big heap. I have completed 1 Duet sock, 1 sock for Pat, 1/2 of a sock for Caroline, 1 mitten for my mom, and 1/2 of another Lorna's Laces sock, courtesy of my dear friend Jane. I think I'm too preoccupied with Mike's job hunt and our impending doom because I seem to be unable to finish anything I start these days. I have so many half finished projects that I really think I need to restrict myself from starting anything else. But as any knitter will tell you, the lure of the new project is always there. Especially when you actually have the yarn and the pattern. I could probably start 7 or 8 more projects. There are times when my stash calls to me. Loudly. But my knitting is so schizophrenic these days that adding one more project might make it spontaneously combust.

Did you know Keith Urban has a new album?
Oh yes. And guess who actually had enough money in her itunes account to get it....

Is Eric truly into Junie B. Jones?
Oh yes, that Junie B--she makes us laugh. Currently we're reading Junie B. is a Cheater Pants. Eric, that kid, is an enigma.

How is that baby, Blake?
We babysat Blake the other night. He has teeth, crawls, eats food--all that real baby stuff now. He is 10 months old (I think...is that right? Maybe 9 1/2. I don't know. I'm preoccupied, people!) and pretty darn cute. The boys and I read books to him before bed and that baby sat on Ryan's lap and listened to all of If You Give A Mouse A Cookie and Donald Duck and the Case Of the Missing Peanuts with more patience than Eric has.

I think those people will be returning at any moment. Sigh.....if I can magically make them all disappear again sometime this week, you may see me again. If not, then you'll know that I've smothered by the mess that can only come from 2 boys and their father during a week at home.

No News Is, Well, No News

Mike's Smooshy socks

If you've come here looking for the job update, I'm sorry to disappoint. I have very little news for you. We are still waiting anxiously for a couple of organizations to contact Mike with interview possibilities. I even saw one of my special contacts last week, the day after the application processed closed. We were not in an appropriate place to discuss it, so I erred on the side of caution and did not bring it up. A decision that is killing me right now.

I too am waiting to hear about a couple of things, but I'm not holding my breath.

Yesterday Mike did receive a call from a company we have never heard of before in our lives. They do software training for corporations and private individuals, and they somehow got his name and resume. He has an interview with them this morning. Since this is one of the few jobs he did not actually apply for in the Seattle area, he's not sure what to expect from them or even what the job is. So, this could be fantastic. Or just a chance to make sure his suit still fits. Either way, it's definitely a step in the right direction.

Yesterday was Mike's last day of work, which means today is his first day of being in the house, looking over my shoulder while I type, and showing me a little glimpse of what retirement is going to be like. Mike not working could be hazardous to his health.

In knitting news, I finished Mike's socks! I really do love the Dream in Color Smooshy yarn. It's soft and the colorway is so pretty in person. I also finished the red scarf and I will show it to you if and when I ever get around to blocking it. Both items can be attractive and warm when worn by the recipients. Or can be very useful in strangling an out of work husband who moonlights as a pack rat. Other than that, my knitting news is pretty ho-hum right now.

Dog Hunt

In fact, it's downright boring compared to what has been going on in the neighborhood lately. On Sunday afternoon the boys were playing outside with Emily-the-neighbor-girl when suddenly a couple of police cars showed up on our street. And the cops started walking up and down the street with giant rifles, ordering everyone inside.

Turns out there were a couple of vicious dogs on the loose and someone called it in. Everyone was to stay inside while these cops searched all the yards for these dogs. The kids were completely fascinated by this and sat in front of the window the entire time, until the cops got a tip that the dogs had moved on to a different street.

I never did hear a gun shot. And we never received any kind of confirmation on whether or not they actually found the dogs. So between the deer that eat my roses, the creature that knocked over my birdbath and broke it in half, and these dogs, it sounds like I should start packing heat.

And now it is time in our program for something completely unrelated: the other day at work I noticed Shannon working with some new sock yarn that I had never seen before. Turns out she used a Louet Hand Dying Kit to dye her own yarn. Now, I have never had a desire to dye my own yarn. I don't understand how it is done and, frankly, it just looks like a daunting task. Until Shannon explained it to me. She dyed her sock yarn to be self striping, and it actually worked. She explained to me what a warping board is, which I believe now I must own, and suddenly it all became crystal clear. It was amazing! And so easy! I have to do this. HAVE TO. I have to dye my own sock yarn.

Granted, I have no money to do this. No money and no time. So really, this is a cruel trick because now I have something else to add to my list of things to fix, replace, and buy when my husband get a full time job. But I am so completely entranced by this idea and the fact that it is truly easy to do. I'm already making a mental list of people who will be getting hand dyed socks from me. Of course, they'll be receiving them when I'm 60, but a girl can dream, can't she?

That's all from here. Keep the prayers coming for Mike--not only for a job, but for his safety, should this take a while. Remember, I'm packing heat.

Not my day

What were YOU doing at 7:30 this morning?

This is how my day began. Two boys up at 5:30, chomping at the bit to play with their brand new basketball hoop. 5:30.

Mike and I have been wanting to get the boys a hoop for a while. They have the little adjustable Fisher Price one in the back, that falls over each time there is a slight breeze, but Ryan has really been wanting an honest to goodness full sized basketball hoop. He loves basketball and is quite the little charlie hustle. I don't have the heart to tell him that his little pipsqueak sized body will most likely not make him a star center, but this does seem to be his sport of choice right now.

Getting a new one was out of the question. If I have a spare $300 to spend, it is certainly not going to be on a basketball hoop. I'll get my antique chicken incubator before that ever happens. Mike has been watching Craig's List, but even the used ones have been pretty pricey. Until yesterday when he found one for free. It's fairly weathered and the net was missing, but who cares! So last night Mike and Ryan picked up the world's heaviest basketball hoop and brought it home at 9:00 last night. We got our neighbor, Keith, to help get the 200 pound base out of the van, and then Mike and I were left with the disassembled pieces and one antsy 8 year old.

Ever tried assembling a full sized basketball hoop in the dark? Whatever you are imagining, that is about how well it went. I am always so careful with my language around the kids and last night Ryan heard words from Mommy that he has never heard her utter before. And I'm surprised he didn't repeat any of it when we explained that we would have to wait until morning to finish putting it together. So at 5:30 this morning both boys were out of bed waiting to play. At 7:00 Mike decided it was time to finish the job, so he turned to me and said "going to teach Eric any new words? He missed out last night".

It's done, they're happy, and now I have to spend the rest of my summer sitting on the front porch watching the boys play basketball.

Today was also the day I decided to start painting the boys' bathroom. I primed it a couple of weeks ago and I have this uncontrollable urge to finish the job. Because I want them OUT of my bathroom. My beautiful chocolate brown and linen white bathroom with all the matching fixtures except for the towel rack that they keep pulling out of the wall and my special jetted tub that is suppose to be just for me. About a month ago their 125 year old toilet broke and, since I'm in the middle of painting, I've declare the whole room off limits until I finish. But I want them out. It is suppose to be my room. In fact, the only reason I allow Mike in there is the fact that he paid for it. But it's mine. And now have I have towels everywhere, little dirty footprints, Spiderman underwear on the floor....I want them OUT. I want them out as badly as I want the moles and deer out of my backyard. The moles who have left about 20 craters in the lawn the the deer who came and nibbled all of my rose bushes last night. All of them. But I digress.

I had the paint all picked out. I was going to use the leftover paint from our halfway remodeled downstairs bathroom, just to get the boys BACK IN THEIR OWN BATHROOM WITH NO MORE HANGING TOWEL RACKS. And guess what. No paint. Empty paint can. Can of paint with no paint inside. More bad words.

I guess I'll spend the rest of the day knitting. The rest of this long day in which my husband, who brought a basketball hoop home to me, will not return until 8:00 tonight. A day in which Ryan and Eric cannot seem to keep their hands off each other. A day in which I have not been able to complete a single solitary task without "Mom.....". It may be a blessing in disguise that I can't paint since I have 3 hats to finish for Willow & Bloom, a pair of custom baby socks to complete by Saturday, and I need to learn an invisible cast off for 2 x 2 ribbing for my sweater.

With all this time on my hands, perhaps I can find a way to train the deer to kill the moles. Kind of a wildlife whack-a-mole. Fun AND functional.

Weekend Update

Ryan and Blake

It's 90+ degrees right now, which means my ability to be witty has been greatly diminished, so I'll just cut right to the chase.

Baby Blake: We finally got to meet our new cousin/nephew Blake! Blake was born about a week ago, but he had a couple of minor hiccups, so the kids and I stayed away and just sent Mike to visit Tiffany. Yesterday we all got to meet Blake. Blake, who is only 7 lbs and still the size of my boys when they were each still inside of me.

Ryan was very excited to meet Blake and really enjoyed getting to hold him. However, this whole new baby business came as quite a shock to Eric. We've been getting the boys excited for their new cousin for several weeks now, but Eric truly has never been around a newborn baby. I don't know what he was expecting, but it certainly wasn't this. Eric looked at Blake like he was seeing a new creature for the first time. And he was looking at us, trying to understand why we were so excited about this little alien mutant that clearly was not an actual human baby. And every time Blake made a little newborn squeaking noise, Eric would laugh nervously and quickly look away. He wouldn't touch Blake and he was not about to hold him. I think Eric has decided to wait until Blake turns into an actual real baby, because clearly that transformation has yet to take place. Eric, who loves snakes, lizards, frogs, and man eating dinosaurs was not going to get involved with this thing.

Critter update: It has been confirmed--we have a mouse living in our ducts. The ducts that run through one of our kitchen cupboards, next to the microwave, which has now become a vacation stop for the little rat bastard. Mike plugged up the vent opening where the mouse seems to be entering, and then made a point of calling me at work to ask if I knew about the hole that had been gnawed in the bag of brown sugar. I don't think I actually shrieked, but I did alarm a couple of customers. And now that cupboard is dead to me.

The sweater: I've been plugging away at it and actually found buttons for it yesterday. And at only $1.30 a button, a true steal. They are pretty darn cute if I do say so myself.

The rest of my life: on hold until this infernal hell-on-earth-100-degree heat leaves the Seattle area. I am unable to function. Fortunately it has not affected my ability to drink.

Critter Update

The bats have made their annual migration to the eaves over our breezeway into the mudroom. I get a friendly reminder of this each time Eric announces "watch out for the bat poop!" I guess I should count my blessing and feel grateful that the bats have not chosen to live above our front door.

The bear that was found just a few miles from our house has now been released back into the wild. Great. Because there is no chance it would find it's way to my neck of the woods. Our house seems to be sending out some kind of beacon to all wildlife. A bat signal, if you will. JEN LIVES HERE AND SHE HATES YOU. COME WATCH HER SCREAM.

I won't even get into the mole issue. I'm much more concerned about the creature that seems to be living in our duct work. Think I'm kidding? Mike, who gave up listening to me rant long ago, is the one who freaked out the other night. Mute the tv! I hear something! There it is again! And I was paying no attention to him until I too heard scurrying from the vent behind the couch. And then from the vent in the next room just a minute later. This should become very interesting in about 3 more days.

And of course there were the honeybees that chose to mate on my back deck door window. They can choose to make their sweet insect love in all of Renton, and they chose my window. At eye level. Where Ryan and Eric, and Emily and Daniel from next door happened to be watching and decided they all wanted to go in the back yard right at a critical, yet intensely private moment. How do you explain honeybee porn to a bunch of kids? All who are talking excitedly at the same time: What are they doing? Look at those two bees! One is on top of the other! They are stuck together! Yeah yeah, get your shoes on and go. Overt your eyes and go.

I'm going to start sleeping with a baseball bat and a can of Raid under my pillow.

Oh Yeah...I have a camera!

Future Stud

I went a little crazy with the camera this morning, but it's a good way to show you what I have been up to this week. And a good way to show you what Eric has not been up to this week.

Here is my little angel. My sweet little lazy shiftless goal-less 5 year old bum. Eric's shirt got wet this morning. His solution? To wrap himself in his blanket. He sees no point in going all the way upstairs to get clean clothing when he is so perfectly comfortable right where he is. Truly, when Eric grows up, he would like to be retired. He would like nothing more than to sit around in yesterday's pj's and thumb through the paper.

Eric's job
And the only productive thing he has done all day.

Eric continues to be a little schizophrenic about his passions. It is often a fluid transition from The Chipmunks to Indiana Jones to Spiderman to unemployed-moocher-living-on-my-couch-until-Dr. Phil-gives-me-the-power-to-kick-his-butt-into-gear-and-force-him-to-get-a-job. And often it's a combination of them all. His passion du jour has been making comic books and he can spend hours, in his Spiderman costume, or half naked, drawing on a stack of paper that has 46 staples in it. All the while quietly humming "Christmas Christmas time is here...."

Sock Wars
I guess weapons
don't work very well
if you don't use them

I do believe I have been a bit more productive this week than that little bum. Although my progress with Sock Wars III is not good. I have no time to do this. I never should have signed up for it. And the person who is to assassinate me clearly should not have signed up for it either because I am still alive. I have been waiting to die for 2 weeks now, and nothing. Nearly 50% of the participants are dead and I am not one of them. I feel bad. It was never my intention to be such a flake and I fully intend to send my unfinished socks to my assassin to keep the game going, but where is she?!? I feel like I need to lob a ball of yarn her way just to give her a hint of what an easy mark I am.

The Office

Because this is how I have been spending my time. Knitting hats. Tons and tons of hats. Orders, orders everywhere. My hands are actually sore from knitting hats. I knit every chance I get to try to catch up on these hats. I'm making decent progress, but there is no time for me to fight a war. I was suppose to go to my final sweater class last night but someone came home late from work, so I ended up not going. Not that I've had any time to work on the sweater, but I would still like to know how Shiori wants us to finish up. So I stayed home, watched 27 Dresses (the worst movie I have seen in a long time) and knit more hats.

The Front Garden
Is that Potato Vine crazy?!

In wildlife news, my garden is growing, I actually have wielded some control over the weeds, and the bats have migrated back to the eaves under our back door. Again. We have frogs in the lawn and I discovered a dead mouse on my garden path.

The Back Garden
Truly, I am shocked
each spring when
things actually grow.
It never ceases to amaze
me that I haven't killed
everything growing here.

I have a new nephew about to be born in the next few weeks and I have nothing knit for him. I've been looking at patterns and yarn, and dreaming in my head, but I was suppose to have 9 whole months to come up with something great. OK, well, technically I have had 9 months. But it sure has gone by fast. And now I have nothing with which to greet him. I have several pink cupcake hats. Do you think he'd like one of those? I also have a half finished woman's size medium sweater. How about that? A beaded scarf that I've ripped out? Oh, the guilt..... I could sit here the rest of the day working on this poorly written disjointed post, but it doesn't change the fact that I have laundry to do, hats to knit, and legos to build. The fun never ends.

Just when I thought I had nothing to blog about today.....

This morning, around 6:30, Eric showed up in our room and, in his most important big-guy 5- year-old voice informed us that there was a mouse in our living room.

"A what?"
"There's a mouse in our wiving room!"
"A mouse?"
"It's sitting by the pwayroom door!"

I froze while Mike ran downstairs with Eric. I mean, of course it wasn't really a mouse. Alice probably threw up a hairball or something. So I lay there, not moving, and then I heard Mike open the back door and quickly shut it. The sound of a mouse quickly being tossed outside.

Sure enough, it was a mouse. It was actually pretty cute. A little furry black thing with a twitchy nose and tiny little tail. It clearly had already dipped into the rat poison we have placed around the perimeter of the house because it could barely move, which is how Mike was able to grab it and toss it outside on the deck.

Eric than ran upstairs to grab Ryan and show him the mouse. Ryan came staggering down the stairs and the first thing out of his mouth was "did Alice find it?". I looked him straight in the eye and told him that Alice is useless. Alice is the only being in our house who does not know about the mouse. Ryan nodded in agreement.

The whole time, Eric is jumping around in his NASCAR underwear, spouting off more very important 5-year-old boy things in his most big-kid voice:

"I think it was looking for cheese"
"Maybe we should kill it and then let Alice play with it"
"I hate mouses, becept Jerry"

This is the second wildlife creature Eric has encountered in as many days. Yesterday he spotted a deer in our back yard, standing by our deck. As this is just the beginning of spring, we've only skimmed the surface of the variety of creatures we will encounter in and around our domicile this season: frogs, possums, raccoons, snakes, bats, more deer and, although we have yet to see for ourselves, there are actually bears in the area. Being 34 years older than Eric, I just don't get as excited as he does when I find a squirrel sitting on my kitchen table eating our leftover lunch.

I think I know where the mouse came from--same room as our last squirrel visitor. Our unfinished-many-openings-into-the-bowels-of-our-house-bathroom. Although we did patch the big hole in our ceiling, I clearly see how a little mouse can squeeze his way through the gaping hole where the drywall does not meet the floor and has been waiting ever so patiently for molding.

You have to admit, this posting is much more refreshing than listening to me whine incessantly about my piles of unfinished knitting, the sweater class I'm going to audit tonight, and that horrid wretched strawberry hat that I finally finished only to discover that it didn't fit me very well, so I took it apart again and threw it on the coffee table where it remains in a big bloody half knit heap. I may use it to strangle the next mouse.

VERMIN UPDATE: Since this posting, we have witnessed a giant raccoon trying to break into our shed. We're sitting at the kitchen table, having lunch, watching this humongous raccoon. Seriously, is this some kind of cruel joke? Are one of you dropping these animals off when I'm not looking just to watch my reaction? Some kind of twisted candid camera?