Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Questions for the Queen

Oh yes, it is time for me to answer those questions that have been keeping all of you up at night:

1. How is that baby, Blake? Our nephew Blake is 8 months old new and precious. And he adores Ryan. Blake is getting to the age when he's a little wary of me if he hasn't seen me for a few weeks. But one look at Ryan and he's all smiles. And I have never seen Ryan take to another human being like he fawns all over Blake.

2. How did you like the Academy Awards this year? Well, let me tell you, you have no idea how close I came to disaster this year. We have discovered that both Dish Network and Fisher Communications are run by the devil. ABC is being held hostage by these greedy capitalists and Dish appears to hate me. Dish has assured me that I can expect an entire $1.00 credit on my next bill for the pain and suffering I am experiencing from missing Lost, Desperate Housewives, and the greatest television event of the year, the Academy Awards. And they know just what they can do with that $1.00. Because I told them. I came home from work on Sunday night, prepared to spend the evening encased in a black shroud. And then my husband, the love of my life and my reason for living, put himself to good use and discovered some dude named Justin who lives somewhere on Planet Earth and was streaming the entire show onto the internet, which Mike downloaded onto his laptop and then connected to our tv. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the miracle of modern science. We still have to download podcasts of Lost each week that mypinktoes' husband uploads for us to keep us from completely sinking into total and utter despair. I'm thinking of creating a Dish Network voodoo doll. Any ideas?

3. You don't seem to blog very often these days. What is wrong with you? Well, you can see that watching tv at my house takes much more effort than it should. So there is one reason. Let's've met Eric. There's another reason. I feel compelled to do laundry on a semi-regular basis, I'm still selling lever shocks (and by "selling" I really mean spending lots of time on ebay uploading information and then selling one thing, and then flinging myself onto the floor in total agony at the amount of hours and fees it has cost me, then I pick myself up and do it all over again. It's a pretty good workout), and I drive to and from school about 25 times a week. I don't know. I'm busy, people! Things to do, people to see, places to go!

4. How is Mike's job search going? Watch the news much lately? It's going about like that.

5. Does Eric seriously use that Snuggie? Every day. Every single day. Not a day goes by that the Snuggie is not put to use. I even caught Mike using it one evening on the couch with his laptop--just like the commercials. That was...not pretty.

6. Knitting anything fun these days? Well, I'm working on a couple of pairs of socks, Mike's sweater, my mom's mittens, and I began a scarf from the Nancy Bush Estonian Lace book, that finally arrived from my Amazon gift card purchase in December, out of Jaeger 4 ply merino wool that I had in my stash. And baby hats. Always the baby hats. Things at Venue have really slowed down (not just for me, but for the entire shop), but Willow & Bloom is still going great guns.

7. Can we get an updated list of the broken things in your house? Oh yes, delighted to share that with you:

Front window--still broken.

Garage door--deader than dead.

Greenhouse window in the kitchen--slowly sinking into the ocean. Apparentely the lifespan of a 30 year old greenhouse window is about 29 years.

Speedometer on the van--broken, and then miraculously brought back to life through the power of prayer.

The interior of Mike's car--scary. Ok, that's not really broken. What IS broken is his ability to recognize the layers and layers of crap and the rattling of empty diet coke cans as they roll around the floor of his car. And the rear windshield wiper and one door lock on his car is actually broken.

Underdog DVD--missing. We have the case but cannot for the life of us find the DVD. Anyone know where it could be?

Mike's laptop monitor--broken and will die, looking much like what happens if we try to watch ABC, if you touch his monitor at all.

My new vacuum--stair attachment broken in two. Well, that makes sense, with me trying to use it and all...

There--don't you feel enrich with knowing all of this updated information about me? I for one feel much better having gotten it all off my chest. And now, since Ryan is home sick for the second day in a row, I have to go watch Shrek. Again.


cori said...

Can you PLEEAASSEEE post a picture of Mike in the Snuggie?!!!

Jane said...

Thinking of you. It's hard these days. One is either unemployed or overworked. Hope things improve for Mike soon. Keep on selling those lever shocks, girl. You're doing a great job!